'Twas the night before trial, when all through the war-room,
The team reviewed a document, more high light and zoom;
The exhibits were marked and prepared with care,
In hopes they would be admitted; and the judge would be fair.
The jury was nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of a settlement filled their heads;
And the client pacing nervously, notebook in my lap,
While I wished for a strong, intravenous frappe.
When out on the corridor there was such a clatter,
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
What was that strange noise; way out in the hall,
A jolly laugh, perhaps it was nothing at all.
When, what to my curious eyes should appear,
But a senior partner, did he ever instill fear!
He was dressed all in red, from his head to his foot,
And his cuff links were massive; and covered with soot!
A bundle of discs, he had slung on his back,
And he looked like a vendor just opening his pack.
What was this extra data, at such a late hour?
The thought of loading it all just made me cower.
The stump of a Cuban he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;
The senior partner laughed; and said the discs were all new,
He dumped them on the table; then mumbled rule 502.
Sixteen hours of work, for this jolly old elf,
And I laughed at the discs, in spite of myself;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;
He spoke not a word, and completely kept his composure,
He showed an index of data; oh my inadvertent disclosure,
Opposing counsel was in for a production surprise, privileged docs,
I could not wait to see their eyes!
So our new exhibits were not needed; we could call it a day,
Federal Rules of Civil Procedure all the way!,
The senior partner sprang from his seat, to his team gave a cheer,
And away they all flew to the tavern for a beer.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he walked out of sight,
"Happy Holidays to all, and to all a good-night."
With the holidays all around us I just felt compelled to create this parody. I also wanted to express thanks to all my colleagues, clients, and anyone else who happens upon my little piece of Internet real-estate. There was many interesting developments in our industry in 2009 and I remain optimistic for many more in 2010. The year end brings no greater pleasure then the opportunity to express season's greetings and good wishes. May your holidays and new year be filled with cheer!
Barry E. Pace